Tag Archives: not advice

Sage Advice 116: My Star Trek: The Next Generation Fan Fiction*

*(I must begin this piece by admitting to everything I remember about Star Trek: The Next Generation: back when I was about eight-years-old, my dad would watch it after I was done watching X-Men the cartoon; the guy from Reading … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 115: Summer Blockbusters Of 2013

I don’t like movies. I’m not sure if it’s because of the loud sounds or that time I walked into a room of three raccoons fighting with cotton swabs and fire and thought it was Transformers 2 for 4 hours, … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 114: A Pussy Bias: Sexism In Our Use Of Vulgar Language

I say dick at least a hundred times a day. Of those hundred times, only about 30% are in reference to my body. The rest of those dick utterances are in reference to vague nouns and other peoples’ bodies. I … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 113: Suggestions For New Flavors Of DORITOS®

The following is a list of suggestions for new flavors of DORITOS®: Leftover Chinese food Dog fur Bread Old newspaper Canadian Canadian bacon A mixture of all the current flavors Sweat Contact lenses Vague meat Nacho con diarrhea Diarrhea con nacho Diarrhea … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 112: Harry Cram, The Film Critic Who Thinks Movies Are Real, Reviews The Dark Knight Rises

Occasionally, I like to have guest writers on Sage Advice. Harry Cram, a film critic I met in a Denny’s restroom when I was in grade school, has been reviewing films over thirty years. He also thinks all movies are … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 111: 10 to Infinity

How many numbers are there? I’m not trying to trick you with this question, but I’ve gotten two different answers to what should be a straightforward query. Some people will say there are 10 numbers. They go as follows: 0 … Continue reading

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Sage Advice 110: The Public Domain Of Me

To the best of my knowledge, I have only been quoted in a widely-read publication once in my entire life. Perhaps it’s important to qualify widely-read: I was quoted in my high school newspaper. Assuming even a slight fraction of … Continue reading

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