Sage Advice 6: Making Perfection

There is an old saying that goes “don’t put the cart in front of the horse, unless your cart has developed a complex thinking process and the ability to move on its own, in which case you should put your horse down as it would only consume your resources over time.”

I admire this saying quite a bit. It sings the songs of structured planning and thinking while considering the possibility of sentient carts. It’s important to gather your thoughts and ideas before acting out on your inevitably disastrous scheme.

That’s why I never keep notes on anything I plan to create. Rough drafts? Absolutely not. Everything I say or do is golden and for good reason: I let it stew in my mind. In fact, there is a strict system. Nothing leaves the chamber of mental obstacle courses that is my mind for at least two years. After the thoughts have done their time, they are sent to my gut to be evaluated, a process that can take up to three months. If they meet the incredibly high standards of my gut, they are then released for a trial run by means of violently random hand gestures. Once this part of their journey is complete, the ideas are ready to be unleashed into reality.

Even the words you are reading right now have been through this rigorous training. I started these words over four years ago, and they are just now entering the final phase of creation.

I take this process very seriously and it even applies to my emotions and reactions. I once punched my brother in the face for stealing my candy ten years prior. The apology for that action is still going through the aforementioned development cycle.

Never say or do or make anything until it is absolutely perfect in your head. After all, do you really want people millions of years from now digging up your less-than-perfect artifacts?

Sincerely,

-Matthew Fugere

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